I Cried it Out Tonight

My friend Peter sent me a message after reading my tweet that I had posted just a few minutes before.

He wrote “Saw your tweet – want to vent? We are all ears.”

So I vented:

Most of the time I’m pretty good, but with June approaching, and only 3 hours allowed per week, the year is almost done. It hit me this week when the principal broke it down into hours and I didn’t know how to respond. Now that I’m planning final tasks, or trying to, I feel like I don’t know enough. I’ve taught art for 20 years, but NAC is slightly different and I’m not exactly panicking but not feeling confident that I’m doing a good job. I want to finish strong while not overwhelming students. I want them to have some good memories of this experience and of me too, if that’s not too selfish. Sigh.

And then I cried. About school, about this whole situation, about my students, about everything I don’t know.

Our conversation began in our group chat with Doug, who is another good friend. And in this little chat, my friends let me vent, sort out my thoughts, accept love and support over the internet, and eventually, I felt better.

I still have a lump in my throat because I’m not sure how to do a good job these days, although I’m trying. Is trying enough? I sure hope so.

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